So You Want to Wear a Safety Pin

Because this is important…

What a Witch

rainbow-safety-pin

Great. This is a necessary behavior in the face of the election of the most overtly racist, sexist, xenophobic, anti- gender and sexual minority candidate in the history of the modern United States. You know the rhetoric of his campaign was wrong. It was the very worst thing about America and you want to do what you can to combat the result. Good. Do that.

But don’t do it without a plan. Because the very last thing a tense situation needs is someone full of good intentions but with no knowledge of de-escalation tactics or self-defense. Your intentions are not a tangible shield. If you don’t make a plan, you will get yourself or the person you are trying to defend very killed.

Let’s avoid that.

So make a plan.

Some of you can stop reading now. You have, or know how to make a plan and you don’t need…

View original post 1,105 more words

Today We Choose

Twenty seven years ago today, an amazing and unthinkable thing happened – a terrible wall that separated a city, a country, and the world fell.  Families that had been divided for nearly three decades were reunited and a world torn apart by the Cold War began to feel a little more friendly and united. A standing Republican United States president had called for its destruction and this wondrous call to action became a reality not long afterward. We cheered and cried and viewed the destruction of the Berlin Wall as a victory for freedom and democracy.

Yesterday, another amazing and unthinkable thing happened – the United States elected another Republican president – one who has promised to build walls in the name of patriotism, one who proclaims unity while encouraging division, one who uses his power for self-gain while touting the greater good. How far we’ve come only to take so many rapid steps backwards and away from the direction of greatness.

Today, we choose, not who will lead us, but rather how we will respond to yesterday’s election and the future that it promises.

For those of us who are anxious and fearful, who are feeling disenfranchised and unwelcome in our own nation, who are vulnerable and at risk… we can choose to let this fear drive us to despair.  We can choose to hide away from the world. We can also choose this time to find deep within ourselves the courage to reach out to our allies and support networks.  We can choose to let our fear motivate us to make positive changes and to  let our anxiety become a catalyst that drives us to a higher purpose.

Those of us who are thicker-skinned, who have learned to withstand bullies and hatred,  whose souls have been tempered by fire and force… we can choose to harden our hearts against this world.  We can choose to respond to hatred and intolerance with our own brand of the same.  Or we can choose to reach out to those who are vulnerable, weak, and afraid. We can choose to use our hardness as an shield to protect those who need shelter. We can choose to let our thick skins be an armor for ourselves as we battle on the side of compassion and love.

Today, we can choose to change the narrative.  We can choose to make this, not the ending, but the beginning of our story.  We can choose to tell it in voices proud and strong and to be the voice for those who have been silenced. We can choose, as we once did, to tear down walls instead of building them.

For those of you are capable, please take this opportunity to support those who need it. Grand gestures are wonderful, but it is the small compassion-filled actions that are often the most needed.  Whether volunteering to help a vulnerable part of the population or simply checking on a friend who might be feeling unsettled and frightened by the election results,  every compassionate action you take will make a positive difference.

I encourage you, if you are one of the vulnerable, to reach out to your support system  and to know that you are not alone.  You are loved, important and valued.  You have worth and beauty. Your story is not finished and there are people out there who will help you to write it in dark and difficult times. No election result will ever change those things.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Seven Candles, Seven Souls

On a makeshift altar in the corner of my kitchen, seven taper candles stand, etched with seven names: Ahrens, Castile, Krol, Smith, Sterling, Thompson, and Zamarripa. The base of each is wreathed in deep red flowers, symbolic of the blood shed. I will visit that altar every hour today to pray that these seven souls cross peacefully to a place where there is no memory of these acts of violence.

For the living, my prayers are very different today.  I pray that we never forget the senselessness of these seven deaths, that we find a way to come together, to understand and value each other as fellow human beings. I pray that when faced with yet another example of the worst in people, we can reach out, not with guns drawn or fists clenched, but with open hands and hearts to each other.  I pray that we never forget that each of us has the potential for actions both heroic and horrific and that we find within ourselves the wisdom to choose the former if we face circumstances in which we must decide between the two.

I don’t have answers for the problems that face us. Like some many others, I have watched with feelings of helplessness and hopelessness as the events of this week have unfolded. I seek refuge in prayer and ritual, solace in the job that I know too well – tending to the dead and their memory. All the while my mind has been on the living – the survivors, the families, and the friends who are mourning these terrible losses.

There are those who would let these deaths further divide us. There are people who will use these deaths as an excuse to perpetuate further violence. I will not be moved to hatred. I will not be moved to violence. I will stand today in silence and prayer with a heart filled with love and compassion.  Today, I will remember.

Into the Deep End…

Today, I swam laps across the deep end of the pool until my muscles ached.  It seems like such a small thing, particularly as it only took about ten laps to leave me feeling like I’d crossed the English Channel.   There was no cheering squad, no medals, no fanfare. The lack of applause didn’t stop me from feeling a sense of accomplishment.

Why is this a big deal? Why, Aisling, are you telling us that you’ve done the same thing that a few thousand other people have done today?

I have been out of the deep end for the better part of the last two years- both in the context of the pool and my practice.  Physical incapacitation has kept me away from much of my normal routine, but today, I am declaring war on the pain and trepidation that was keeping me in shallow waters. I am, quiet officially, sick of being sick and of being held back.  I love playing in the water, just as I love the work I do on my path.

Today I swam laps across the deep end.  Tomorrow, I am doing a ritual for a friend who lost his grandfather this past week.  Forget treading water, I’m diving into the deep end again.. and I couldn’t be happier to be there.

 

 

Myth-Behaving

Two days I sat down to write about a topic to find that either my browser or laptop would crash at every attempt to put the words down.  So I picked up a pen and paper… to find that the pen was out of ink.  While I was busy grabbing another pen, one of my lovely cats managed to shred the notebook.  I am taking all of this as a sign that now is not the time for that particular post.  Ironically, it was about the behavior of certain tricksters.  Go figure.

Since that post does not wish to be written, I’m turning my thoughts elsewhere and pondering the idea of writing mythologies.  I’ve touched on writing mythological tales in other places, including a novel that retold the story of Ragnarok from the prospective of a disenchanted Valkyrie. What I  have in mind isn’t a re-imagining of existing stories, however, but telling of stories that I’ve created for my own amusement as I’ve wandered down this path.

Thematically, the stories fit well with this blog, but I think it would be distracting to post them within the main blog.  My plan is to create a separate section on this site for those tales. This will allow me to keep the main blog focused on actual events, practices, paths, and people. I may sometimes give the backstory or further explanation of a myth here, but the stories themselves will have their own space. That’s the plan – if life and certain tricksters don’t interfere.

Spring Is Coming

Spring is coming.

Ok, so perhaps that proclamation does not quite carry the same dramatic weight as Ned Stark’s meteorological prophecies, but there’s still an important idea somewhere in those three words.  Winter has exited stage left, taking with it the deep introspection and pervasive darkness that marks the season.  The stasis and stagnation of the coldest months is giving way to growth and rebirth and color is returning to nature again. It is time for the shadows to recede and for light and life to come back to us.

A personal winter seems also to be winding down and yielding slowly to spring and life renewed.  In leaning into the pain during the last year, I have also leaned into shadowed and darkened places within myself. In the darkness of a long winter, there has been time to slowly take apart some things that have been troublesome and unapproachable by the light of day.  I’ve had the opportunity to ask a lot of questions about the whys and hows of those bothersome issues.

The sum result of all this introspection is this – I have, in some important ways, failed myself. While I could write a volume or two about it, it can be summed up in a  few salient points.  The first is that I have allowed myself to let fear and guilt keep me in a very destructive work environment under the thumb of someone who on their best of days is a bully and on the worst is a textbook example of sociopathic behavior.  The second is that I have failed to listen to my mind and  body’s many warning shots that something has been amiss because I have been so wrapped up in that work situation.  The third, and thankfully last, is that I have been I have failed to listen to those voices which warned me about the two previous points – both internal and external, human and other.

Recognizing failure is one thing. Do something about it is quite another. Action, growth, and change are necessary, however, and I have spent much of the new year working to rectify the failures. I have parted ways with the troublesome employer in favor of a workplace where there is a zero-tolerance policy for bullying.  I am attempting to not just listen to but actually understand what my body is telling me, although it is with the same slowness and misunderstandings of learning any new language.  Being more mindful of the words of my allies has been the easiest of the changes by far because the trust I have in those voices is still very much intact and I am painfully aware of what ignoring them can cost me. These are just first steps on a long journey, but they are steps in a much needed change of direction.

So, yes, springs is coming and with it, a promise of new growth and change. And it’s about time.